who am I?

Hi, I am Marianna Kocsany. I am a psychologist originally from Hungary and I live in Amsterdam for more than 10 years. I studied psychology in Hungary and practicing therapeutic work since I moved to the Netherlands.

Psychology itself is a very fast progressing field. Practices that we used to do 5-10 years ago are outdated in comparison to the newest interventions. I am consciously choosing to evolve as a therapist too, keep learning the best and most effective methods available, so that healing and change can be experienced as soon as possible for my clients.

Individual Therapy

On individual therapy our goal with my clients is to identify and heal attachment wounds and moving towards (more) secure attachment. Going through this process allows them to become psychologically equipped to build lasting relationships, and feel comfortable to commit to a new partner. Clients who are dealing with anxious attachment (fear of abandonment, overthinking of relationships) are becoming more confident and start choosing for safety instead of unavailability/ unpredictability in their relationships.

There is a practical side of healing attachment, which is about learning what secure attachment really is, how does it look/ feel like in practice, and how can we set healthy boundaries and talk about needs/ desires smoothly. In order to really change our wiring however, deeper work is needed that usually goes further than relationship advice/ talk therapy. That is why I am combining practicalities with psychoanalysis, EMDR, and integrative practices in my sessions. Depending on the personality and capabilities of my clients, sometimes I involve creative art therapy, and embodiment (i.e. feeling or movement of the body), to integrate positive changes faster.

“Marianna has a really refreshing approach to dealing with bonding issues, and is a bit of a miracle worker. It took us just two sessions to work through issues I would have never been able to work through my own.” - Jonas 31

Couples Therapy

I find the Gottman Method the most transformational method when it comes to couples therapy. It is also very easy to apply, because of it’s practicality and reliability. I am using this method for several years now in my personal life and for my clients and I am very confident that it works, not only because it is backed up with scientific research, but also because of my own experience.

The Gottman method is naturally increasing the sense of trust, security, and connection between partners, and it trains couples how to deal with conflicts in an effective manner. It takes conversations (especially conflicts) to a level, where the partners feel empathy, and feel understood. When we go beyond the surface and let go the urge to prove a point (“who is right?”) we get to a vulnerable and meaningful conversation, where both partners’ needs, desires, and dreams can be heard and further integrated into the relationship.

Although this method is highly recommended to most of my clients, it has its limitations. When it comes to sexuality, and sexual chemistry, I am using other interventions, that are mostly focusing on open communication about intimacy, and actual physical practices (often given as homework).

“We came to Marianna at a time when our communication was not working. We seemed to have different opinions on everything, and as a result were getting entrenched into our own standpoints, no longer being on the same side. 

Marianna helped us break down the issues we were having using simple techniques designed to understand the other's actions. Each session we would take one real life topic or situation and really break down how each of us were experiencing it. This turned feelings of frustration and resentment into understanding. I found her approach to be very practical, not just asking questions, but helping us apply concepts in a way that worked for each particular situation. We also learned skills to support each other emotionally and deal with frustration, so that we can now keep going on our own.

It's incredible to see how such small changes in the way we communicate can have such a big effect on the way it's received. We are very happy that we took this step!” - Fred & Alina

How I work

I am giving therapy both in English and Hungarian at my home-office, in Amsterdam Oud-West. There is always an option to do sessions online, but my preference is that we have at least one session in person.

Usually we start with an intake session, where we get to know each other, and identify what will we work on and how. It is highly advisable to do the intake in person, because that is how we can grasp if there is a “click”. I always give some help and useful advice already in this initial meeting, so that it worth the investment, regardless of your choice of moving forward or not.

After the intake we usually see each other on a weekly basis (sometimes biweekly). It is totally up to you if you wanna go one by one or prefer to commit for a longer period of time. Sometimes commitment helps, especially in couples therapy because in itself it creates the feeling of certainty.

It varies how many sessions we need in order to fully treat the issues that clients come with. My intention is that the therapy is as effective as possible. Couples usually need one big intervention that can take 5-20 sessions, depending on the case. Clients who come individually might go through their journey periodically, with intensive periods (more frequent sessions) and integration periods (having break from therapy).